The Dolan Family, currently living in Pennsylvania, have hosted three students: Hana from Japan, Kika from Slovakia, and Putt from Thailand, who they call ‘lifelong family members’ – and they’re planning to welcome their fourth student from Iceland this summer! This interview, originally facilitated by our AFS Volunteer Team in Western PA, dives deeper into their experiences hosting Hana from Japan during the 2023-24 school year, and how their hosting journey has evolved since.
What made you decide to host and what reservations did you have?
For years, our kids had asked us to host an exchange student. We finally looked into it, especially since our daughter, Lexi, was deeply interested in foreign service and languages, and even considering studying abroad in Japan someday. Her positive experience with a high school exchange in France sealed the deal.
In researching exchange programs, we discovered AFS and were immediately drawn to their mission statement and the strong network of local volunteer support. Although we initially considered hosting a student for a single semester, we read a profile and letter from a Japanese girl who seemed like the perfect match for our family. Looking back, I am so glad we overcame my initial hesitation about committing to a full year!
What were some anxieties you had?
Our biggest anxieties stemmed from the unknown. We had never hosted before, and we worried if Hana would truly fit into our busy home, enjoy our small town, and continue her high-level violin playing. All three fears were quickly resolved. She immediately became a cherished family member. Coming from Tokyo, she loved the freedom to walk around our small town, enjoying the fresh air and open space. For her music, the high school’s new orchestra teacher was a perfect fit. She was also accepted into the local college’s (IUP) symphony orchestra and played with them all year. She also auditioned for and played in the all-state orchestra for the high school, which even most American children never get to do!
What did Hana get involved with while she was here?
Throughout the fall and winter, she was a dedicated cheerleader and Key Club member. She also actively volunteered for various organizations and events, including Indiana Wrestling, the Junior Women’s Civic Club, United Way, downtown festivals, and IUP Unity Day. Furthermore, she generously tutored her neighbor in the violin.
Musically, she achieved high recognition, securing a spot in PMEA states with the IHS orchestra. She further showcased her talent by performing with the IUP Symphony Orchestra and Chamber Strings. Her involvement at school included playing the violin in the IHS Christmas talent show and performing at pep assemblies. Beyond music, her school activities included working on the tech crew for the spring musical and being a member of the Drama Club.
In addition to her many commitments, she cherished simple, everyday activities — many of which were less common where she lived. These included shared pastimes like cooking, playing board games, watching TV or movies, outings for ice cream, feeding the birds, and going for walks or hikes.
What is a core memory you have from Hana’s time in the U.S?
A key moment that our entire family will never forget was during our annual family reunion. We have a talent show, and Hana surprised all 100 relatives by learning our ‘family song,’ Country Roads. She played it on her violin while we stood in a circle, holding hands and singing along—there was not a dry eye in the room, and it truly solidified her place in our extended family. Hana said that ‘playing the music in the family circle was a precious and tearful experience, because hearing them sing and seeing their faces made me remember all the joy spent together with them.’
(We also really valued our daily walks together, which gave us time to just talk.)
How has your relationship with Hana been since she left?
Our relationship with Hana and her family remains incredibly close. We text often and manage the 12-hour time difference with regular FaceTime calls. She even returned for a visit just seven months after her exchange, which was a highlight. She visited while we were hosting our Slovakian student, Kika, and the two ‘sisters’ had a lot to talk about, and a lot in common already. They loved spending time together. We are eagerly anticipating our next reunion.
How did Hana’s exchange experience impact the rest of your family?
The impact was profound and extended far beyond our immediate household. The ‘Country Roads’ talent show at the annual reunion was a highlight that brought our extended family closer and made them feel connected to the experience. More generally, many of our friends and relatives became involved in Hana’s life, and she developed a large, supportive family system during her stay.
If you met somebody who was interested in hosting today, what would you say to them?
I initially doubted if we would ever find ‘time’ for hosting. However, after three years, it has become an essential part of who we are, and now I can’t imagine our lives without it. We easily make time for it and still pursue the things we enjoy. In fact, our students have encouraged us to explore nearby places and town events we had never experienced before, allowing us to discover neat things in our own area. You will gain a new daughter or son from around the world and have the privilege of participating in citizen diplomacy.
We love seeing all the girls experience life in the U.S. Seeing them experience these “firsts” is unique and special. We loved seeing them celebrate [holidays and foods] for the first time, and [other events like] shopping, prom, pep rallies, sporting events, parades, or even the excitement about getting to try and choose classes at school that they do not get as options back home. All three cultures and students were different, but all were amazing experiences. We love them all so much and all became lifelong members of our family.
We have met some amazing new friends through AFS! Our kids know kids all over the world, and we have all learned cultures beyond the ones we’ve hosted!
Hana’s experience, in her own words:
How has your relationship with your host family impacted your exchange?
It has brightened every single day of the exchange. The biggest challenge was getting through the host school life. Because of my shyness and insecurity in my language skills, I struggled to meet new friends at school, especially in the beginning of the year. My host family had always been my mental support, making my day so much better and special, regardless of how much homework I had, or how much I regretted missed opportunities with my friends or making new ones. If it were not for their cheerful everyday chats, family dinners, game nights, and fun and new activities every weekend, etc., my exchange life wouldn’t have been this precious and exciting.
How has your relationship with your host family been since returning to Japan?
It’s still going very well, thanks especially to Tara, my host mom. She has been sending heartwarming messages on a daily basis even after I returned home (for almost 2 years!) I almost cried of happiness when they shipped me thoughtful birthday gifts and Christmas gifts (for two years straight!) as well as heartwarming cards. It makes me so so happy and I’m just amazed at the way they make us exchange students feel loved and special. I can’t thank them enough forever and I love them so much.
Kika from Slovakia and Putt from Thailand On Their Exchange Experience:
Kika: “The most impactful moment of my stay here was the first day at the airport when I saw my host family holding a welcome sign and coming home to gather with family with USA themed food. It made me feel immediately welcomed into the family. I am hoping to come back and visit this summer.”
Putt: “It was a brand new experience being a member of a sports team. I was exposed to new ideas, like what it means to be coachable. I made a lot of new friends from the teams and it’s one of my highlights of my time here.”
